Thankful and Blessed

2012 is just about to wrap up and I can’t help but just be thankful with the faithfulness of the Lord above all His blessings throughout this year. Many times I missed to attend the church, read the bible or say “thank you’s and I’m sorry’s” but His love endures forever. My shortcomings has no bearing with the amount of love He’s been giving me since. It was indeed, unconditional.

This year is certainly a roller coaster ride. I have experienced loss, new endeavors, faith, hope, love and more. My fingers will not suffice to count every blessing the Lord has shed throughout the whole year, not only with me but with the people I love dearly.

My 2012 may have started with goodbyes, first with Sodexo (previous employer for two years whom the people I have loved and place where I have been molded professionally) and next, when I lose mom last February. I am glad that the Lord filled my heart with joy to move on with life and true enough that when He closes a door, He opens a window, when the Lord called me to the unexpected place, Dubai, shortly after mom’s death. It is in this unexpected place where I have started to build a relationship with my sister and her family. I’m merry to gain new friends with their friends and I am excited to see how our relationship will blossom in the months/years to come.

I came in Dubai holding a tourist visa which is only valid for 30 days, otherwise, extended for another month which will cost me few more grand, but, the Lord loved me so much that He has lead me to Atlas, my present employer. I was only on my second week in Dubai when I found work. Yey! But hey, the challenge didn't stopped with getting an employer, my faith and patience were also tested when I exit in Iran while waiting for my employment visa to come in. I, again, has gained new friends from there and the memories will surely be treasured. I love my colleagues in Atlas dearly. They are friends to me and the joy they bring to me everyday is awesome.

2012 is also a year of miracles. My family has gained three new addition to our clan. The new source of our joy, our new babies, Raine, Axel and Aj. These babies are truly miracle from the Lord especially Aj who came only after 10 years of marriage of Kuya Ton and Ate Jo. Aj is an epitome of an answered prayer. Baby Aj is a testimony of how prayer can move mountains. Kuya Ton and Ate Jo have cried rivers from few miscarriage in the past, but, as they say, everything happens in His most perfect time.

Above all, It is in this year I mature as a Christian- the best thing ever happened to me. Life is never the same since and I am very excited to see others experience the same. I can’t thank ate Sheila enough for accompanying me in VCF Dubai and for introducing me to Jen, my small group leader. I have not only gained friends with them but a spiritual family whom I can laugh, cry and share the same faith with. I am giddy to grow more in faith with them in the years to come.

The Lord however does not only want relationship with me, but to serve a purpose to save others through discipleship. I had my first disciples this year through Aika and Alexis. Yey! I can't wait to see them mature with the Lord too.

Above are only few highlights of this year, not to set aside, new gadgets, relationships, restoration, answered prayers, everyday protection, provision, strengths, abilities and His plans and purposes coming true in my everyday life. The way I see things now are far way different from how I used to. I thought that success and money are the best things in the world, but they are not. After all, they all shall perish. It is my relationship with the Lord which is eternal. Btw, I melt every time the Lord uses me to bless others - one of the best feelings in the world! =)

I am thankful with how the Lord has been moving in my life. It is in my weakest points, I found perseverance, patience, humility, forgiveness and faith.

But the best is yet to come. I am sure 2013 will be even better. It will be a year of breakthroughs and yes’s from the Lord! *dances*

Bidang Kontrabida

We all have villains in our lives. The person who is always "kontabida" to our wants and our decisions in life. A person who will define us with most negative words. Well folks, I am no different because I  have one too J Pero siya ang bidang kontrabidang mahal ko at sure akong minamahal din nang nakararami - my loving Kuya Andrew.

Being raised in an adaptive family, kuya and I’s relationship were never established. We only lived together when I was already in high school. I must say, siya ang Clara at wicked witch ng buhay ko dati. J I still remember his photo album defines me as “papansin”. He always "kontra" my wants in life. I remember nung one time, nag overnight ako sa extracurricular activity ko sa school - na pinayagan naman ako ng parents ko, at siya, as usual, hindi! Aba kinabukasan, nasa kanto pa lang ako namin, hinila na ang buhok ko pauwi ng bahay namin. Dinaig ko pa si Mara sa iskandalo at dinaig pa niya ang nanay ko sa pagdidisiplina. And please don't forget, I'm already  in high school. Tsk tsk.

Pero siyempre, glad we both matured. God loves me so much that he has restored our relationship. I  have zero grudges :)

Being far from home made me missed kuya especially this Christmas. We’ve been bedmates for sometime before I move in to Dubai. Tabi kami niyan sa bed. Kahit na sobrang lakas ng hilik niya, ok lang. I used to tell him, utang na loob, ako muna patulugin niya, so I will always go to bed earlier than him. Awa ng diyos, count ten pagka higa niya at hihilik na iyan nang bongga! haha! Even kahit na tinatandayan niya ko at pag ako na, ayaw niya na, ok pa din. Walang patid na usapan at wagwagan sa mga kaengutan namin sa buhay ang peg namin every night. haha! 

Pero I still remember din nung sobrang na heartbroken siya, para akong nanay na di matiis tingnan siya ng ganun. Dahil sa emotions ko, inemail ko si "x" na spare his sanity and leave him alone, at ayun, binlock ako ni "x" sa Facebook. Oops sorry kuya!

But what I missed most besides our shopping escapade sa divisoria at pasig for holidays, ay ang good heart niya. Naks! Many will agree to me na para siyang nanay namin, masyadong mapagbigay. People will always run to him for help. He’s not hard to crack. We have this little bonding during Christmas which I really look forward in doing again, kuya and I will buy donuts or burgers and we will distribute it sa mga pulubi sa Quiapo. Very humbling experience and the joy is one of a kind. Actually, we used to both dream of building a foundation someday. Promise me kuya, let's hold on to that dream a. Anyhow, God gives the desires of our hearts.

I am sure God sees the goodness of your heart and He will return the favor to you. I won't be tired to pray for you too. I love you everyday kuya! Missed you bad. Let's travel soon.

Always,

Arris

Mabini's

Never in my entire life did I imagine myself working abroad. I have once considered myself nationalistic (naks!) and the last thing I can do is to abandon my country and let other place reap what Philippines has sown for me. But as they say, GOD is unlikely. He is a God of unexpected. He has callings in unexpected places and perhaps, even with unexpected people.

My move in to Dubai is spontaneous until the latter months of last year. I must say, it was an abrupt decision. Nevertheless, God has been supportive of my decisions in life and allow me to flew to Dubai without any hassle with my documents nor with the immigration.

But just like how the place is unexpected, the people were also unexpected. I am currently living with my sister, ate Lhen, her husband, kuya Joel and the joy of our lives, baby Raine- aka Mabini’s.

I never thought I can build a close relationship with ate, because, we never had the chance in the past due to I grew up in an adaptive family. Little did she know, I have once looked up to her. In fact, few of my paths were copied from her (oh noes! haha!) - theater organization (we are both Artists of the Year when we graduated. Naks!) love for math, Jollibee and call center work during college. Isa lang ata ang di ko natahak, ang kaseksihan niya. Di din siya skinny okay?! haha. But I must admit, I still look up to her to this date. Her love to her family is selfless. I am a testimony of her love, patience and understanding. Kaya naman, you better be good kuya because another ate is way harder than winning jackpot in lotto.

My first months in Dubai were never easy. The anxiety is hell but I’m glad I made it through with their help and my spiritual family in Victory. I cannot thank the Lord enough for blessing me the people I have in my life now. They have been an inspiration and their love and concern for me is just awesome! Their existence is only a confirmation of how great the Lord is.

I wouldn't be tired of praying for more blessings to come to your lives because you all deserved it. The Lord sees the goodness of your hearts and He will return the favor to your family. Cheers to more months and more years together. Love you all!

Victory in Defeat

Low crime count, minimal traffic jam, numbered people in malls, superb station ratings and raining advertisements- these are only few scenarios in the Philippines each time Manny Pacquiao has a boxing fight and I must say, yesterday is not any different except that he is fighting for the fourth time against Juan Manuel Marquez.

I am certain that they both had their fair share of hard core training. I even heard Coach Roach giving Pacquiao a thousand dollars for every man he will knocked out during his sparring.  Well, I heard he pound four. Whoa! On the other hand, Marquez got into his perfect shape in his secret garden. Marquez has been quiet in his strategies while Pacquiao’s trainings were open book since day one.

As all of you may know,  the fight ended quite unexpected. The last second wicked right hook of Marquez on the sixth round has kicked Pacquiao off the canvas. It made the Filipinos shocked and Jinky, his wife was terrified on the ringside. It was unexpected. The last time Pacquiao was knocked out was more than a decade ago and he has been the undisputed boxing champion of the world for quite sometime now. Well, not until yesterday.

The social media was flooded by reactions- both bashers and cheerleaders. I am saddened with how the Filipino people reacted negatively. It is as if Manny is as good as his last fight. All the pride he brought to the country throughout the years were swiftly unremembered. He was being crucified by his Christianity; he is getting old; he is over confident; he shouldn’t win because he has all the money in the world; and a lot more words of discouragement, but, of course, all the persecution were anticipated. Indeed, you cannot please everyone. Nevertheless,  I can’t be any happier for the cheerleaders on the other hand. I am sure that their words are genuine and are relief to massive muscle pains to Pacquiao. Certainly, it was uplifting to his morale.

This morning I got to read his statement in Yahoo News, and I quote "First and foremost I would like to thank God for keeping Juan Manuel Marquez and me safe during our fight. I want to congratulate Juan Manuel. I have no excuses. It was a good fight and he deserved the victory. I think boxing fans who watched us were winners too."

I am blissful to see with how the Lord is moving in Pacquiao’s life. The time he chose to live the right path is just but music to my ears. I am sure he will make a difference in the world of sports just like how Jerry Lin has affected his collagues in NBA. Not to set aside the people he can save from the limelight of show business too. I pray that his faith will not be shaken by this defeat for victory is tested in defeats too. After all, it is not the title nor the belt, but the crown of eternal life Christ has won for us by His victory on the cross. I pray that God will continue to use Pacquiao by leading others to victory in Christ too.

Allow me to end this post by my favorite scripture in the bible: "give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus"- 1 Thessalonians 5:18

P.S.

I love it too when Gary V tweeted " Marquez won, but there will be other bigger challenges you will overcome outside the ring, and it will prove that you aren't just a boxing champ but a real winner for the God who still has so much more victories for you in all aspects of your life.  I stand with u my bro. This loss doesn't define who and what u are in the eyes of God”

Prayer Backer

I lost mom on 3^rd of February due to complications of pneumonia she’s’ got from lying on her death bed since the heart attack 6 days past. I never left her side since day one. She’s the mom I’ve known since I got my senses and just the thought of “I might lose her” is only disheartening and the least I can do is to stay beside her.

Mommy is not my biological mom. She and daddy have volunteered to take care of me since my parents cannot afford to, due to their work requirements. We are usually lent to our relatives when we were young. Mommy has been suffering Alzheimer’s disease for years and I am proud that I’m one of those she never fails to remember. She knows me so well and my stubborn days are clear to her. She’s the disciplinarian while daddy is my Thor, my shield from the tyrant. When daddy died when I was five, I gained another parents with their daughter mama and her tart, papa.

The picture of mommy when she suffered seizure is still vivid. I never thought I would find happiness in a ventilator. Every pump means only hope to me and her tiny gestures are like priceless moments. But mommy only got worse, depending more from the apparatus since the seizure. Her body is numb from the medications and the hope I’m getting from the ventilator is wee.  The breath pumps are slowing down and my only respond is to pray for her better. But just when I thought the Lord has heard me, the doctor took that speck of hope away when he announced that at the rate mommy’s going, she cannot make it and will be giving up any time soon. The insensitivity of him to even ask would we wish to unplug the apparatus to curb her pain is only but an arrogant act to me. How can he gain the nerves to share those thoughts to us? Did he just say, kill her? What if is he’s in our shoes, can he even bear to listen to those words he just uttered?

I can’t help but cry and question the Lord on his will. I recall his miracles and even reconfirm his real will for mom- so we have decided to do the natural way, maintain the cables and go on with the medications. If the Lord’s will is to take her away from her pain, protect her from the bullies of this world who do not understand what is Alzheimer’s disease and to let her eat as much sweets she would like without worrying her diabetes - then the Lord will take her to heaven, where a family reunion awaits with her union with daddy, her eldest, Kuya Ram and her youngest, Kuya Jong – and yes the Lord’s grander plan is painful but the thought of her salvation and eternity with the Lord made me still. I am certain that she is in peace there.

I missed her bad. I missed her sweet goodbyes when I leave for office everyday and her warm welcome “nandiyan na ang poborito kong pamangkin” when I come home. Even the neighbors missed her waves when they pass by her seat outside our house. I can only wish one more day or even one more hour to spare her my patience, say as much I love you’s and thank you’s, but I know when she looked down from heaven, she is proud and happy to where I am now. At least, she is closer to the Lord now- she’ll be our prayer backer in heaven. She can make “kulit” the Lord na to answer our prayers.

Until we meet again mom. Until I can hug, kiss and pinch on your cheeks again.

I love you everyday,

Ariz